A lot of parents dread the teenage years. Social media and television depict such difficult times that we often dread these happening to us. We think that being prepared is better than being caught off guard. When our child is approaching his teen years, it is best to start introducing rules and regulations. Below are some tips that we got from The Saltbox.
5 Parenting Tips For Your Teen Child
1. Our child is not our enemy
We sometimes feel that our teen is angry at us when he puts on a sullen face and refuses to talk. Don’t take things personally. Sometimes, our child might just be tired and cranky from a long and tiring day. Adults feel stressed and fed up with the world sometimes, so do kids. Do not nag or insist on opening up.
We should just gently probe about what is bothering him. Stop when your teenager shows signs of getting angry or frustrated. We should give him time to feel your presence or support. Maybe he will open up eventually. Just remind him that we could have an idea of how to deal with his issues or that we could be good listeners to his problems.
2. We cannot solve all of their problems
We parents often have a difficult time accepting that our kids have grown up. Their problems and issues often stem from their own decisions or lack of decisions. To help our teens be responsible adults, we should guide them to make sound decisions of their own choosing.
Have a good talk with him about the consequences and responsibilities. Allow him to find his way around the problem and to talk about his options. Show him some options that he might not have thought of but guide him into making his own decisions. Teaching him to think objectively and carefully will help him in the future.
3. It could just be a test of boundaries
Many teenagers like to shock us in a bid to show independence, forward-thinking, and that they can make their own decisions. Tattoos, piercings, and dyeing their hair are just a few of the things that younger teens like to talk about. The fact that they are discussing these with us shows that they want to see our reaction, opinion, and to get a rise out of us.
Listen carefully to what they want and why they want it. Discuss the pros and cons of their choice before stating our opinion. Hair dyeing and piercings may be more acceptable for some parents compared to permanent tattoos.
4. Know their friends
We may have less difficulty getting across our kids if we are familiar with their friends. Try to invite his friends over if they need a place to hang or to make projects. Make an effort to get to know them but not in a creepy way. Our teenagers may seem distant to us but there are lots of times when they are proud of us to their friends. We should be good examples to our kids and their friends to harbor openness.
5. Be familiar with signs of danger or alarm
Not to be an alarmist or anything but we should read up on possible signs that our kids are going down the wrong path. Read up on updated warning signs and possible signs of danger. This is especially true for teenage girls who might be coerced or befriended by people with bad intentions.
Overall, it is important to bond well with our children while they are young so that our relationship with them is strong and stable. Starting when they are still a toddler. Imparting knowledge and advice is good but listening and empathizing with them is better. Some of our kids may just want to be heard or vent out their feelings.